Hollow from the inside…

Its been a long time, without you my friend. I’ll tell you all about it, when I see you again.

I really missed bogging all this while. I had so many posts in my head everyday but really, I really couldn’t muster the time to grab the laptop to type. I love blogging.

A lot has happened over the past few weeks. To begin with, my better half got my mobile phone fixed. Thanks to him, it works like new. Well almost. But it is much better. No more virus bugging me every instant. Battery is much better. I also got a cool back cover for it.

There is a destination I aim to reach in the next year. So got our stuff together and made our move. Hoping God lets everything go smooth. Big Goals ahead on this on!

Who said God doesn’t answer prayers. Sometimes you don’t even have to ask. My son got circumcised  a couple of weeks ago. My sister in law visited us for two days. Her dad asked her to wake up one late afternoon. After much mumbling, she sweetly said,” Daddy please let me sleep, I din’t catch a wink all night”. There was so much emotion and sweetness in her voice. My heart ached for my dad. At that very moment boundless tears flew out of my eyes. When will I get a chance to say something like that to my dad. (My parents and siblings live abroad in the KSA). Lo and Behold! The very next day my dad called up saying Grandma isn’t well and he is coming to India in two days time. MY EXCITEMENT KNEW NO BOUNDS. One ache, one sigh from my heart, and God sent my dad instantly overseas. Right to my house. Grandma is in a vegetative state with no medications. Just waiting for her time. Only I, only I know that God sent dad for me. And not for any other reason. I hugged my dad hard when he came. I couldn’t stop my tears . He has gone frail, but stronger in faith. His enigmatic charisma beheld my eyes and heart in awe. I love my dad. I missed him so much. I got to bond with him for a week. And then he bid goodbye. He went back to mom and siblings last Tuesday. (Well, now I am missing mom)

It has been very hot this summer. Temperatures really shot up. I have become really tired of constantly washing sweat filled clothes. And the current keeps cutting off. Two days back, hubby and me decided to move our furniture around to give a fresh look to the room. Beneath my dressing table he found a mouse. A dead mouse. It did not stink. There were no insects around it. It was dead. Along with the other dust I swiped it into the dust pan. I got a moment to look at it closely.

It taught me a lesson for life. Stagnant things become hollow from the inside. Stagnant things are dead things. There is a huge difference between being Constant and staying Stagnant. Life needs to have principles to be governed by for consistency. These should be imbibed to evolve in life. To move in life, even if it is moving behind or ahead or sideways.

That mouse got stuck. It couldn’t figure out a way out of its situation. So it sat stuck. It died. And the summer red fire ants ate up every single nerve, organ, everything of the mouse. Except its outer body. They permeated through its skin and ate it up. They left it hollow. When we found it, it did not look dead. It appeared very much alive. It’s when I shooed it with the broom, that I found it was dead, and hollow.

I got goosebumps at the realization. Never stay stuck, never. Always evolve. Always move ahead. Always, always keep moving.


Drama Series: Tum Kon Piya?

I often watch TV serials/ dramas. Both Indian and Pakistani. It never mattered to me who is acting or how. What beholds my heart and eyes is the thought, and feelings centered in the series.

Among the many that I have watched and loved, I watched TUM KON PIYA?  (Who are you love?)


It is a completely heart wrenching story, based on a novel. I had my own questions about how things developed and eventually ended. But then I realised, they tried to make this as realistic as possible. And true, sometimes fate is cruel to even the nicest people on earth. The concept being that the afterlife is a Supreme court, that makes the best judgement in favour of the good over the evil. The evil is always defeated. Sometimes people get a chance to repent over their misdeeds. Some don’t.

That is what this story is about. A doting father, single handedly raising three beautiful, well-mannered and ethically strong girls. On the other hand, a prestige loving, affluent and money minded couple also happen to have a completely humane and loving son.

Elma and Ramish. Two people whose love isn’t normal infatuation. Their love is heavenly. You don’t have to be together to love someone. This is a kind of love of human life. Not love for beauty. But the words are PAKEEZAH (Pure) and Hamdardi (humane).

Due to the immense arrogance of his parents Ramish never gets to marry Elma. She is wedded into a family who has no value for her, except being a maid for them and saying yes all the time. Elma’s weakness angered me a lot. She didn’t stand up for her rights. Maybe some people are like that, soft and gentle, the world can trample over them. The moron she gets married to, Zarbab,  is understandably obedient to his slightly-wicked mother, but is shamefully cheating on his wife throughout the relationship. Not totally his fault. He couldn’t convince his mother to marry him to his lady love either. Sadly, I found the culture very unfair, where parents delve right into the matters of the heart thinking they know it all. All three families had the same concept here, the parents thought they were doing best for their children. It did appear like that for a while. But eventually a man lives with his woman. If he doesn’t like her because she is not his choice, then it is just a SAMJHAUTA (compromise). That totally defies the concept of marriage. But sadly, that is mostly how it turns out in the Asian subcontinent. No, I am not painting everyone with the same brush. But whenever this happens, it is truly heart breaking.

Elma never gets to marry to Ramish. The IZZAT (respect) that her father wanted her to live with was the very thing that destroyed her life. Her sisters stood by her side always. And Ramish never let anything come in between his humble nature of keeping up with promises. His big heart gave shoulder to so many weeping hearts.

Waqar Ali: The doting father. He brought up his daughters with good moral values, endurance and a high sense of humbleness. I truly admired his nature of holding self respect above and beyond money and greed and cheap talk. He taught his daughters only about love. Never about the evil around the world. Maybe that is why Elma couldn’t fight back. She just went on enduring everything.


Elma: She was the flower of the movie. The pure rose, very loving very caring. extremely obedient to every relation. Very humble and forgiving. I felt very bad for her. Her afterlife will be successful, but she endured a painful life.

Seema: Elma’s second sister. Fate was on her side. Her life moved on like a cream on the cake. Always caring for her father and sisters.

Neha: Emotional, strong, loving caring youngest sister. She sacrificed a lot too. She eventually married Ramish, sacrificing her dreams of love and her own family, just so that she can take care of her sister’s son Afnan and also being able to serve Ramish’s aging mother and father. All this in trying to return the immense favours endowed on them by Ramish.

Zarbab: The lover of Juveria, but husband of Elma. The most spine-less character in the series. A man who gets flowed away by other’s commands but unhappy because he doesn’t like where things are going. A man of no weight, no sense of responsibility. The only thing that held him good was utmost obedience to his mother. His punishment in the end: He lost his mother to cancer, his love Juveria destroyed him because he couldn’t fight for his love for her, his brother Arif destroyed his relation with his wife because he didn’t trust Elma, he could never think clearly, and in the end, his own son refused to accept him as his father.

Sharafat: Mother of Zarbab, Arif and Sobiya: A hardened woman, who brought up her children under tight financial situations that made her biased and extremely critical and controlling. She completely controlled Zarbab, ruining his marital life. Destroying trust, the concept of mother’s love, unfairness, in her fear of being abandoned in old age. Because of her partial love, she couldn’t nurture Arif well, who turned out to be a complete brat. When liver cancer hit her, she realised her mistakes, made it upto Elma, but died disturbed for her kids. She tightened finance on her children and made them count for every penny. In the end, when she needed money the most, she didn’t have any. To the point that her kids had to sell the house for her medication.

Sobiya: A good girl, obedient, a little naughty, but good natured.

Arif: A jealous, spoilt to the core brat. He completely disrespected his mother, betrayed his brother, completely destroyed Zarbab’s life. Didn’t let him marry Juveria, and then broke him and Elma apart. His punishment: his wife took all of his money, share in the house and abandoned him. Because of his deeds he ended up become insane, leading a painful life in the mental hospital, screaming at Elma and his mother to forgive him.

Juveria: A sharp minded modern girl, who loved Zarbab dearly. She did everything she could to win him, to fight for him. But everywhere she ran behind Zarbab, he only left her in the middle and ran away. It felt very nice in the end, when fate sided with her, she got a comfortable independent life and someone who was ready to hold her hand without hiding away.

Muzzaffar: Ramish’s father, utterly scheming, business minded, calculative. Someone who would go to any extent to what he wanted. He forced upon Waqar to divert Elma away from Ramish by degrading Waqar in the worst way possible. Everything that Waqar eventually did was to save his self-respect. It took Muzaffar too long to realise his mistakes. It took time him too long to realise that he had utterly ruined his son’s life and happiness.

Tamkanat: Ramish’s mother. A lady with only her head held way too high. Her words, her thoughts, her decisions worse than mud and dirt. She gets partially paralysed as her punishment. She eventually recovers, then decides to mend the life of her son which she broke apart.

Sumbul: A practical minded girl, who got attached to Ramish, but when she realised that his heart belonged to Elma, she strengthened herself and bid him well. I felt sorry for her. Her feelings were played with, only because of the arrogance of  Ramish’s parents,

Ramish Hassan: The true hero. An extremely well-played character. An example of humbleness. A rare gem that stood by for so many people who weren’t his own. His undying sacrifices to mend so many lives. His pure love for Elma, beyond the love of flesh or companionship. If people should be, they should be like him. Always there for those who need him. Him his priorities always sorted.

TUM KON PIYA: The question that Elma and Ramish want an answer for. The reason behind their pure love, that gives them strength in each other to fight in the jungles of their respective lives.

This series made me cry. I cried a lot. A lot. It moved so many strings of my heart. It made me want to be strong. It made me want love with all my heart. It made me want to stand up for the good and be harsh for the evil and not it creep in. It made me want to be humane. It made want to be righteous. It made want to do something for my parents. It made me want to love my life partner and give him all the happiness in the world. So that he shouldn’t have to wander lost in this cold world.